March the Ninth 2014.

It Has Come To My Attention That I Don't Actually Fit Any Of My Bras. #Awkward

WARNING: TMI Ahead. 

Although it isn't clear the title of today's blog actually means I've been hauling out my room.  Sort of.. I have a bag full of all the clothes in my upstairs room that are both clean and dirty and I'm supposed to go through it and figure out what fits and what doesn't, but I put my socks, undies, bras, and stockings/tights in another smaller bad and when I was putting my clothes in that bag I noticed that a) all my bras were different sizes and b) none of them fitted me.   So that's bad, I'm going to have to get rid of a heap of clothes before Mother will let me get new ones, but I'm hoping this will be an excuse to go up to Hobart of Melbourne and get fitted and buy a few matching sets that aren't from Kmart.  When Father heard that I wanted matching underwear he thought it was for a 'boy' (Mother corrected him and said any guy I got with at my age wouldn't be a boy but a man...) I had to inform him that when I wear matching underwear I feel like a superhero with a costume and it's an awesome feeling! So that's been happening.  I'm going to go through those bags this afternoon, after I finish this post, and also go through the clothes in my room downstairs.  I might also tidy my room up a little so I can light candles without worrying about catching the house on fire. 

Topic Change:

On another note, last night I had a nice bath and I realized the only bath bombs I have and bath salts were Lavender and Rose and I hate both those scents so I've been looking online and, after remembering some of Tanya Burr and Zoella's blogs and vlogs, remembered a store called LUSH and decided to see if they have any stores in Australia, they do.  In fact the have one in Hobart, so Mother and I are planning on heading up there in the next few weeks to buy some nice bath products in scents I like.  Mother thinks it's strange that I hate scents like Lavender and Rose, I don't know why... I just prefer beachy scents and fruity/candy scents.  I've also been looking online for some brand candles, I found a Bath and Body Works online store that ships to Australia that has some really adorable candle scents like Red Velvet and Frosted Cupcake, and a bunch of other yummy smelling sounding scents!  So I'm going to order some of those.  

I also found a few other cute websites that sell bath products but I don't think I'll be getting anything from them so I don't see the point in mentioning them at the present point in time. 

Topic Change:

I've also made a decision, I've decided I won't blog everyday.  I will however try and blog at least 3 days a week.  I'm also going to try and start making some videos if I spend a day in town or something.  

Topic Change:

So I've been wanting to read werewolf books lately, but I've already read some of the better ones multiple times so I've been brainstorming writing my own, because they never have the things I want so I though why not write exactly what I want to read?  I know I've said this before, you know.. Started planning to write a novel and all, and I know it probably won't go far, but I really want to.  I'm honestly going to try, after I finish my outstanding pieces of homework I'm going to start writing it.  I told Leprechaun my idea and he said it was really good.  I've already thought of some really cute lines and moments and I've written them down.  I don't want to share too much in case it falls through.  But yeah, I mean I've been craving a YA Werewolf novel and none of the ones I've found besides the ones I've read over and over really have what I want.. And the protagonists and whiney and boring and the males aren't alpha at all and I admit it's a secret confession that I love alpha males... So yeah, I'm going to probably re-read one of those books tonight to fill my craving.

Topic Change: 

My hair is so soft right now!  I have it in piggy tales, I love wearing piggy tales, I don't get to do it often because it sometimes looks silly, but I just feel so happy when I have them in.  Same as when I have my hair curled.  At the moment I have piggy tales and they're partially curled, so I'm feeling pretty good! 

Topic Change:

So I've been been meaning to re-paint my nails for the past two weeks.  They've literally peeled off by themselves.. Well except for my right thumb nail.  So I'm going to paint them tomorrow after doing some work on my poem.  Even though it's coming to Autumn I want to paint them a teal blue?  I mean I need to go out and buy a plummy purple but I don't have one at the moment.  

Topic Change:

I want to start using Instagram, I mean I already use it.  But I want to actually start using it regularly and posting my own photos.  Go and follow my account @becca_theory.

Topic Change:

Update: So I've sorted through my clothes, I have my clean ones in a cupboard OUTSIDE of my bedroom, along with my pajamas.  I have a pile of clothes I no longer want or need to be fixed in the lounge room next to Mothers sewing machine.  I have a load of washing going now and when that's finished I'll go through keep and throw.  And later tonight I'll go through my underwear/bra/socks/stockings/tights pile for clean keep, dirty keep, and throw. I actually think I'll be getting rid of a lot of undies because as Mother said when I was trying to explain it to her they've lost their shape.  They aren't comfortable to wear anymore and they're sort of looking like granny pants even though they're $15 Bonds hipsters, they don't stay where they sit, they move around sometimes causing wedgies and stuff, so going to chuck a heap of those.  I'll keep maybe three that aren't too granny like for that time of the month.  Because even though it isn't required I'm always scared I'm going to ruin a nice pair of panties.  Mum also said she needs to get sized as well because she's lost a little weight, so we're going to go do that, maybe make a day out of it? Who knows, it'll be nice to go out and just spend a day with mum, get some bras and undies, go to LUSH, buy some make-up, go to a Cafe and get some cake.  So I'm hoping that'll happen, I need to finish my outstanding pieces of homework first.  Get caught up.  Hopefully it'll be before Mother and Father go off on their holiday.  

Topic Change:

So what have I been doing the past few days?  Well on Friday Leprechaun came over and we just basically did nothing for a large part of the afternoon, then we (I say we, but really all he did was peel the potatoes and sweet potato) cooked a roast lamb dinner with roasted potatoes, and mapled carrots and sweet potato, with some corn and green beans, and a fresh salad.  It was really nice and I'm proud to say I can cook a mean roast and some damn good veggies.  Leprechaun actually ended up sleeping over, he slept on the couch as per usual.  In the morning, I say morning... I mean like 10:30, or 11 or something?  Anyway, I whipped up an egg mixture for him and he cooked that while I cooked some spinach and ricotta agnolotti pasta with a five cheeses tomato pasta sauce, it was really nice and I actually had more of it (the last of it/other half of the packet) for lunch today.  I had a bath last night after we rushed Leprechaun home because he forgot he had work.  I used a rose bath bomb, it was just a generic one from the cheap stores in town, I had a coconut candle and a vanilla candle burning and I used the same shampoo, conditioner, body wash, and body butter that I mentioned in my February Favorites post which is linked HERE. Today I've mostly just written this post, played Candy Crush and organised my clothes, or whatever it is that I did.  I also watched a few YouTube videos. 

I think that's all I have to say to you guys at the moment.  Ciao.

Live long and prosper, godspeed. 

Becca.  

March the Sixth 2014.

Ball Of Anxiety In My Tummy.

Hey guys, I haven't been too great today.  I don't know why specifically... I woke up late this morning, I was allowed too, my classes didn't start until 12:45 so I woke up around 9 am and had my medication (Ritalin L.A).  After that I had a glass of Coke.  But it wasn't the Coke that made me the way I currently am, and was back then.  Anyway, I had my medication and started on my Reading Journal homework, I noticed after finishing my personal analytical response to one poet and was starting on the next that my hand was shaking, not violent shakes, just little tremors.  Now this isn't anything unusual, it happens quite a lot and not only to me but to many other people.  But also my temper had started to rise, and I was just so mad at this poet and she did nothing wrong?  I was extremely critical or her work and I wasn't even talking about her technique or anything, I was just saying that her poetry was shit, which is cruel of me.. But I couldn't help it.  Soon after that the words and lines started to sort of mess up in my head and I couldn't concentrate anymore.  By this point it was around 12:35 and I requested that Mother drove me to school.  My first class was English Writing, and we're just starting on our second poems.  While I was writing I noticed hat my hand was still tremoring, and usually after like half an hour it stops, but it hadn't but I just dismissed it.  I had to speak to Craig (my teacher) about the topic of my Character Poem and ask if doing someone so close to me was okay because my teacher last year had advised me that it wasn't a good idea.  So I went and spoke with Craig, now the person and moment that I wanted to capture was quite personal and really close to home, but not sad emotional, or overjoyed with happiness emotional, nothing that would warrant tears, and yet as I was speaking I noticed that my voice was shaking and my emotions were becoming stronger, harder to contain.  I'm not sure whether Craig noticed or not, I doubt it, but I was so worried that I would end up crying.  I had this ball of anxiety sitting my the pit of my stomach and it was almost painful, I even sent a text to Leprechaun (not that he received it till later because none of my classrooms have reception).

"My reaction to my table today isn't good... My hands are shaking.  My mind keeps going o bad thoughts..... My heart is thumping like crazy.... I feel like it's constricting." 

I sent that too him.  It was true, still partially is.  I know it has something to do with my medication, I just don't know what.  It might have something to do with the fact that I didn't eat anything at all yesterday except for some Cheezles and that I didn't have breakfast or lunch today.  But I've had food since then and it's still bad.  

Anyway, yeah, my heart was pounding, I had this ball of anxiety in my stomach, I felt like my heart was being constricted, closed up, I still do.  My hands were shaking, my eyes couldn't focus on anything, my mind was jumping all over the place.  In Graphics it was slightly better but only because I was distracted.  Even so focused on my work I could still feel my heart thumping too fast and I could feel the ball of anxiety growing, expanding.  This afternoon I tried to play it off because Camroon, Leprechaun, and Christopher Robin were all at my house, but I think Leprechaun picked up on it.  Now sitting here alone in my room I can feel my heart still constricted, I can feel this huge pit of worry, of anxiety in my stomach, I can feel my mind rushing but slowing down, and I can feel and see my hands tremoring. I hate it, I wan to immerse myself into a fictional world to escape whatever is worrying me and I can't help but feel like something bad is going to happen or is happening and I hate it.  I just want to escape it.  I'm going to go find a novel to get stuck into, or a website to get hooked on, or create scenarios in my head about happier things, or about different situations.  I should probably eat something too, all I've eaten in the last two days is some Cheezles and nuggets.  I probably didn't eat much the day before that either.... I feel like I'm on the edge of having a break down and that scares me more than anything, because one I have a break down I shut down.  I shut everyone out and I loose people close to me.  So I pray that that isn't the case.  

Also this quote has been stuck in my head all day.

"Life is a gift.  Not a right."

I wrote it on my hand but I accidentally wrote write not right.  Which was slightly amusing. 

Live long and prosper, godspeed.

Becca.

And remember Jesus loves you and God has a plan for you life. 

March the Second 2014.

How Do You Tell If A Lemon Is Ripe?

Okay, first order of business to be discussed is about a novel I included in my February Favorites post.  It was the novel Alienated by Melissa Landers, I have been waiting for quite a few months to read this novel, it was easily one of my most anticipated novels for 2014.  Unfortunately just a few pages in I recognized that the style of writing didn't draw me in the way I had hoped it would.  It wasn't written poorly, far from it.  I just wasn't able to relate to the characters Landers presented to me.  And personally, that's one of the main things that sells a novel to me.  Because of this I decided instead of reading the entire thing thoroughly I would simply skim read it; if I liked the ending enough I would go back and read the in-between's that I missed the first time round.  I won't lie, the novel was what I expected given that I had already read other peoples review's in preparation for reading this one.  It didn't exceed my expectations and it didn't thrill me either, that's not to say it was bad.  It was well crafted and written, and the plot line is perfectly adequate.  It just wasn't to my liking, I think I prefer a little more action and blood-lust? I send the following text to Leprechaun immediately after finished my skim-read this morning.

"Hey, so I just read Alienated.  It was relatively what I expected.  But after waiting for so long for it, I can't help but feel a little disappointed.  I didn't like the ending or the direction of the next novel.  But I'm hoping it will improve."

There were some cute parts, and I loved the human/alien interaction.  But as I said before, I think I'm a girl who prefers blood-lust to politics.  As seen above, I do intend to read the next novel, if only to see if the plot improves.  

It wasn't a novel I loved, but it was a nice light read and I still would recommend it to others if they like Alien Romance novels.  Not to mention the cover is amazing and so it's the sequels! The male protagonist, our resident Alien, was very Spock like in his observations of human interaction and behavior, but slowly he thaws so that's sweet, just an observation of mine.  

See, such a pretty cover!  It's what sold me originally.

Next order of business, I don't actually have one to be honest.  Although I did have an observation this morning while picking lemons off our tree for Father Dear's tea; how can you tell when a lemon is ripe?  Usually we tell if fruits are ripe by their flavor, if they taste sour they usually aren't ripe.  But for a fruit that's sour when ripe, how do you tell?  I know some of you will be thinking the answer is what colour it is, but that isn't right because even when they're yellow they're not always ripe..  I asked Mother Dearest what her thoughts were and she simply said that it doesn't matter if they are ripe of not, my Fathers taste buds disappeared years ago after being forced to eat horrid food under my grandmothers watch.  But my question still remains.  I'm contemplating looking it up on Google but I fear I will be left unsatisfied, much like when I looked up what the clip/clasp that is on bread bags was called (for those of you that don't know, they're called Bread Clips, how disappointing?).  So I don't think I'll do that, I'll just make a list of my theories and present them to the internet (being you lovely people) and see what you all have to say?  Or I'll get bored of such a menial task and look it up.  Now I must depart, I have a half finished poem that is due tomorrow and more poetry to read and analyse for my Reading Journal, that task also requires 3 more pages of writing.  Furthermore I want to spend the next hour wasting my time on Pinterest because I'm a procrastinator (almost wrote protagonist, although that would actually be correct.  I am the protagonist in my own life, am I not?).  

Live long and prosper, godspeed.

Becca. 

March the First 2014.

An Apology And My February Favorites!

An Apology:

Firstly I'd like to apologise for my absence the past few days.  I haven't been sleeping well and there were some books and I just didn't end up posting.  So for that I am sorry.

February Favorites:

So there are some things I've been seriously loving this month, and I'd like to share them with you! 

Beauty, Body, and Bath:

This month I have been obsessed with Coconut scents!! I've been using Organix Nourishing Coconut Milk Shampoo and Conditioner.  It makes my hair so soft, silky, and smooth!  And my hair smells delicious!! I've also been using Palmolive's Body Butter Coconut Scrub along with Dirty Works Coconut Body Butter.  These make my skin so smooth and smell so yummy!  Everyone near me always begin asking who smells so good and I just sit there smirking to myself! I've also got another product that would be one of my favorites this month but I didn't actually possess it (and haven't used it) until the other day when Cookie returned it.  That product is Le Tan's SPF 50+ Coconut Lotion, good for my skin and smells yummy! In the beginning of the month I didn't have the Body Butter so I was using a moisturizer, it's been my moisturizer all year actually.  It's You's Pomegranate Body Lotion.  It isn't coconut but it smells divine!  I've also been usng NU's Balance Citrus Coconut Moisturizing, Foaming Hand Wash, Enriched With Aloe Vera.  It smells yummy and fresh and actually makes me hungry so easily.

In addition to my Coconut Craze products I've also been obsessed with Formula 10.0.6's So Totally Clean Deep Pore Clenser.  I got this first back in 2012 when I went to Sydney and fell in love, it's done wonders for my skin!  I've been buying it online since because I haven't actually seen at my chemist here in Tasmania.

Books:

I've read a few books this month, most in a series, so I'll just post the first books and their's 'blurbs'.

Throne Of Glass by Sarah J. Maas.

After serving out a year of hard labor in the salt mines of Endovier for her crimes, 18-year-old assassin Celaena Sardothien is dragged before the Crown Prince.  Prince Dorian offers her her freedom on one condition; she must act as his champion in a competition to find a new royal assassin.  Her opponents are men-thieves and assassins and warriors from across the empire, each sponsored by a member of the king's counsel.  If she beats her opponents in a series of eliminations, she'll serve the kingdom for three years then be granted her freedom.

Celaena finds her training sessions with the captain of the guard, Westfall, challenging and exhilarating.  But she's bored stiff by court life.  Things get a little more interesting when the prince starts showing interest in her... but it's the gruff Captain Westfall who seems to understand her best.

Then one of the other contestants turns up dead... quickly followed by another. 

Can Celaena figure out who the killer is before she becomes a victim?  As the young assassin investigates, her search leads her to discover a greater destiny than she could possibly have imagined.

Raised By Wolves by Jennifer Lynn Barnes

(WARNING: If you don't like sad endings do not read the third, and final book, in this series.)

Adopted by the Alpha of the werewolf pack after a rogue wolf brutally killed her parents right before her eyes, fifteen year old Bryn knows only pack life, and the rigid social hierarchy that controls it.  That doesn't mean she's averse to breaking a rule or two.

But when her curiosity gets the better of her and she discovers Chase, a new teen locked in a cage in her guardians basement, and witnesses him turn into a wolf before her eyes, the horrific memories of her parents' murder return.  Bryn becomes obsessed with getting her questions answered, and Chase is the only one who can provide the information she needs. 

But in her drive to find the truth, will Bryn push too far beyond the constraints of the pack, forcing her to leave behind her friends, her family, and the identity she's shaped? 

Sanctum by Sarah Fine

"My plan: Get into the city.  Get Nadia.  Find a way out. Simple."

A week ago, seventeen-year-old Lela Santos's best friend, Nadia, killed herself.  Today, thanks to a farewell ritual gone awry, Lela is standing in paradise, looking upon a vast gated city in the distance -hell.  No one willingly walks through the Suicide Gates, into a place smothered in darkness and infected with depraved creatures.  But Lela isn't just anyone - she's determined to save her best friend's soul, even if it means sacrificing her eternal afterlife.  

As Lela struggles to find Nadia, she's captured by the Guards, enormous, not-quite-human creatures that patrol the dark city's endless streets.  Their all-too-human leader, Malachi, is unlike them in every way except one: his deadly efficiency.  When he meets Lela, Malachi knows something Lela doesn't -the dark city isn't the worst place Lela could end up, and he will stop at nothing to keep her from that fate.

There's also another book I want to put here even though I haven't read it yet.  I've been waiting for this book for a long time and I'm really excited to read it!  

Alienated by Melissa Landers

Two years ago, the aliens made contact.  Now Cara Sweeney is going to be sharing a bathroom with one of them.  

Handpicked to host the first-ever L'eihr exchange student, Cara thinks her future is set.  Not only does she get a free ride to her dream college, she'll have inside information about the mysterious L'eihrs that every journalist would kill for.  Cara's blog is about to skyrocket.

Still, Cara isn't sure what to think when she meets Aelyx.  Humans and L'eihrs have nearly identical DNA, but cold, infuriatingly brilliant Aelyx couldn't seem more alien.  She's certain about one thing, though: no human boy is this good looking.

But when Cara's classmates get swept up by anti-L'eihr paranoia, Midtown High School suddenly isn't safe anymore.  Threatening notes appear in Cara's locker, and a police officer has to escort her and Aelyx to class.

Cara finds support in the last person she expected.  She realizes that Aelyx isn't just her only friend; she's fallen hard for him.  But Aelyx has been hiding the truth about the purpose of his exchange, and its potentially deadly consequences.  Soon Cara will be in for the fight of her life- not just for herself and the boy she loves, but for the future of her planet.

TV Shows:

Even though I've only watched one episode, I'm obsessed with CW's new show Star-Crossed.  IMDb's page for this awesome new show is as follows: About an epic romance between a human girl and an alien boy when he and eight others of his kind are integrated into a suburban high school 10 years after they landed on Earth and were consigned into an internment camp. That doesn't tell you much, the show is spectacular and even though there's a lot of comments and reviews saying that despite it looking good they don't think it will be picked up for a season two, I think it's going to be spectacular!  There is so much potential!  I highly suggest everyone to go and check it out, especially if you're into sci-fi love stories or like Jennifer L. Armentrout's books from her series Lux (Also a really good series, go check it out, the first book is called Obsidian).

Websites:

Okay, I may have said this before, in fact I'm sure I have, but I'm obsessed with Pinterest!  It is such a versatile website and it's so easy to use, and so much fun!  The Wikipedia page for this wonderful website describes it as the following: Pinterest is a visual discovery tool that people use to collect ideas for theit different projects and interests.  People create and share collections (called "boards") of visual bookmarks (called "Pins") that they use to do things like plan tripe and projects, organize events or save articles and recipes.  It's just such a great, easy website.  You can plan holiday's, weddings, parties, you can create a style board, it's just such a versatile and useful website!  Go check it out!

Pinterest

Becca's Account

Apps:

I'm not a big app user.  I use the Tumblr, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, GMail,  YouTube and Kindle apps.  But recently I've really started using four other apps.  One book app, two 'useful' apps, and one gaming app.

The book app isn't actually from any app store, I don't even know where leprechaun got it, but he downloaded it from the internet onto my phone for me.  It's called 10000+ Free eBook Reader.  It is amazing, it has so many books just waiting to be downloaded and read!  And it's free, takes about 30 seconds to a minute for each book to download and you can read anywhere!  

The two 'useful' apps are so useful!  One is (sorry Gentlemen) a Period Tracker.  It's so simple to use and very helpful!  It's called P Tracker and it doesn't just allow you to record when your period starts and when the next one is due (etc..) but it also allows you to record how you feel and to make your own comments about things regarding your period.  There are heaps of these apps available and not all will be what you're looking for, so it's good to look one that suits your needs.  There are ones available that tell you when you're fertile if you're trying for a baby, and tell you when it's safe to do the frick-frack and so on.  Apps like this are just so useful and even though it's gross to admit it's saved my underwear! 

The other 'useful' app is a timetable/school app.  It's called My Class Schedule and it allows me to put in my timetable, when specifically my classes start and finish each day, who my teacher is, where the classroom is, and I can put in what homework I have and when it's due.  I can also put in my teachers details such as e-mails, phone numbers, and I do believe I can enter where their office's are.  It also, helpfully, turns my phone on silent when i'm in class, so I never have to worry about my phone going off in class! 

The last app I've been using is a gaming app called Free Fall.  It's actually a Disney app for the movie Frozen.  I haven't got much to say except it's really fun and annoying, and slightly addictive but not as addictive as stupid Flappy Bird. Just a good time waster in-between classes.  

Songs:

I don't remember what artists I liked at the beginning of the month, my taste in music changes so often, but at the moment I'm loving three artists.  Daughty, Landon Austin, and Within Temptation. All three artists are different (although Daughty and Landon are slightly similar compared to Within Temptation) and interesting.  My favorite songs by each are as follows:

Daughty: Waiting For Superman, and Baptized.

Landon Austin: Superman, and Once In A Lifetime.

Within Temptation: All I Need, and Shot In The Dark.

Candles:

I can't specifically say what brand my candles are because they're just generic ones from my local 'cheap' store.  I've been using scents such as Strawberry, Coconut and Vanilla, and French Pear.  They're really nice smells and if you see these scents in a bath and body shop or something I highly suggest getting them.  They make my room, and bathroom, smell spectacular!