February the First 2014.

Late in the winter of my seventeenth year, my mother decided I was depressed, presumably because I rarely left the house, spent quite a lot of time in bed, read the same book over and over, ate infrequently, and devoted quite a bit of my abundant free time to thinking about death. 

Anyone recognize that quote?  No?  Okay.  Oh I just made myself sad.  It's the first paragraph (actually it's a sentence but humour me) of The Fault In Our Stars by John Green.  

This novel is one of my favorite even though I can't re-read it.  Not because it isn't good or anything it's just the last time I read it I cried for five days and I still get emotional thinking about it.  The reason why this wonderful novel is the topic of today's discussion is because I made the stupid decision to watch the trailer.  No this wasn't stupid because book to movie adaptions are always terrible, which I doubt will be the case with the TFiOS movie because of how involved John was with the filming, [On another note Leprechaun is reading Paper Towns by John Green and he was bending the cover -it's my book- and he said it's fine because it's paper.  And we found this funny.] no, the reason why this was such a terrible decision was because I was crying not thirty seconds in.  It came out just the other day and I've been putting off watching since, so why did I watch it?  Because Tyler Oakley mentioned it in his recent video and somehow that led to me typing it into the search bar and consequently tearing my heart into a million little pieces.  But although I did get emotion I loved the trailer, it had some of my favorite moments shown, Gus's introduction, the lonely, vaguely pedophilic swing sets seeks the butts of children (Not that specific scene but the swing set) [Another interruption I was just looking though quotes for this marvelous novel on Goodreads.com and found a funny -painful- quote that made Leprechaun say he was smooth.  Which was followed by me shoving my face in my pillow and weeping that a man as smooth as Augustus Waters came to a tragic fate.), the Venn diagram Hazel drew for Gus, and the kiss in Anne Frank's house.  It was just such a wonderful trailer, and novel, and I'm sure the movie will exceed all my expectations!  Shai, Ansel, and Nat look awesome as their characters and I just think they are all perfect for the roles they're in.  I can't wait, but at the same time I can, because I'm so scared to actually watch the movie because I hate crying in movies and I know I'm just going to week with this one.  Okay so I'm going to stop with this and maybe show you some of my favorite quotes?  Copied and pasted from Goodreads.com because I honestly can't be bothered to write them all up. 

“Headline?" he asked.
"'Swing Set Needs Home,'" I said.
"'Desperately Lonely Swing Set Needs Loving Home,'" he said.
"'Lonely, Vaguely Pedophilic Swing Set Seeks the Butts of Children,'" I said.” 

“You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I'm grateful.”

“Gus: "It tastes like..."
Me: "Food."
Gus: "Yes, precisely. It tastes like food, excellently prepared. But it does not taste, how do I put this delicately...?"
Me: "It does not taste like God Himself cooked heaven into a series of five dishes which were then served to you accompanied by several luminous balls of fermented, bubbly plasma while actual and literal flower petals floated down around your canal-side dinner table."
Gus: "Nicely phrased."
Gus's father: "Our children are weird."
My dad: "Nicely phrased.” 

“Because you are beautiful. I enjoy looking at beautiful people, and I decided a while ago not to deny myself the simpler pleasures of existence” 

“I'm a grenade and at some point I'm going to blow up and I would like to minimize the casualties, okay?” 

“It's a metaphor, see: You put the killing thing right between your teeth, but you don't give it the power to do its killing.” 

“It's just that most really good-looking people are stupid, so I exceed expectations.'
'Right, it's primarily his hotness,' I said.
'It can be sort of blinding,' he said.
'It actually did blind our friend Isaac,' I said.
'Terrible tragedy, that. But can I help my own deadly beauty?'
'You cannot.'
'It is my burden, this beautiful face.'
'Not to mention your body.'
'Seriously, don't even get me started on my hot bod. You don't want to see me naked, Dave. Seeing me naked actually took Hazel Grace's breath away,' he said, nodding toward the oxygen tank.” 

“I believe the universe wants to be noticed. I think the universe is inprobably biased toward the consciousness, that it rewards intelligence in part because the universe enjoys its elegance being observed. And who am I, living in the middle of history, to tell the universe that it-or my observation of it-is temporary?” 

[I just started crying because one of these quotes which I forgot and oh god... This is surprisingly hard.  Just one more and I'll stop.]

“Me: "Touch the cave wall."
Computer: "You touch the cave wall. It is moist."
Isaac: "Lick the cave wall."
Computer: "I do not understand. Repeat?"
Me: "Hump the moist cave wall."
Computer: "You attempt to jump. You hit your head."
Isaac: "Not jump. HUMP."
Computer: "I don't understand."
Isaac: "Dude, I've been alone in the dark in this cave for weeks and I need some relief. HUMP THE CAVE WALL."
Computer: "You attempt to ju-"
Me: "Thrust pelvis against the cave wall."
Computer: "I do not-"
Isaac: "Make sweet love to the cave."
Computer: "I do not-” 

Now that I've convinced all of you who have not yet read this marvelous piece of literature to go and read it and in doing so caused myself great pain I shall tell you what I've done today.  Because I actually left the house.

So I wasn't actually going to go fishing.  I was planning on just continuing my wonderful slumber but alas an idiot that does not go by the name Leprechaun in the real world but does here came over and woke me up.  He then proceeded to tell me that we were going into town because Sharp hurt his back and Cookie slept in. So I, you know, woke up.. Sort of? And we walked to McDonald's to meet them which took longer than expected.  We then wandered around letting the males look at knives eventually ending up at an Antique store in town which has lots of old books, Cookie bought me one which I though twas exceptionally fascinating called The Secret Language Of Birthdays by Gary Goldshneider and Joost Elffers.  Weird names but whatever, it's pretty cool and creepily accurate so I suggest you all go look at that. Then after doing a lot of walking for very little purpose I requested that Mother Dearest come and bring Leprechaun and myself back to my humble abode. That is to say my father's humble abode because I am a seventeen year old girl who doesn't actually plan on moving out until forced because Mother cooks and it's free.  So that's what happened with me today.  I think Benny Boy is talking but I'm listening to music and he just came in.  Very rude. Oh and Leprechaun saw The Princess Bride for the first time, I've informed him that he must quote what the priest says at my wedding if I ever have one. Because that's funny and I just love that movie.. Anyway, so I'm going of sign off for the time being.  I may make another post later if anything interesting happens but given that this is me I highly doubt it.  

"Okay?

Okay."

Live long and prosper, godspeed.

Becca.