July 2017: How I Feel

Sometimes I feel like I should just give up on this TAFE stuff... But I don't have anything else to do - if I'm not studying I have to look for work and I don't want to work (plus I'm not exactly suited to any type of employment that hires without previous work experience).  Like it's taken me half a year to complete a tiny portion of a book that should have taken me less than 2 months.  I suck.  I'm crap at this.  Just because I like organising money doesn't mean I'm capable of doing this.  Like even working in the class with the teacher and other students I fall behind - I just wish I had a different option.
I wish I was different.  More capable and driven.  Like take my best friend for example, she decided early on what she wanted to do and she stuck with it and really put herself out there so she could get the education and experience she needed to make that career happen.  She moved three hours away for an opportunity to continue that experience (even though it led her back home).  I chose to do English courses and chose to not follow through with Uni options because I basically flunked every class due to stress.  Then I chose a Cert 4 TAFE accounting course - which I hadn't prepared for by choosing math classes at Don - then fell behind because I'm useless. And looking at my parents - they were so successful.  Like mum was basically partner to a HUGE business that created the prototype for something that later went on to save lives  She can walk into a house and assess what needs to be changed to provide adequate living conditions for someone with a mental or physical disability.  Dad worked for Australia's leading telecommunications industry, Telecom, and has diplomas and masters in stuff I don't even understand the names of. And even though Ben hasn't had success with education or a career - he's improved so much in what he's capable of accomplishing since he was first diagnosed with Autism.  He's creating incredible things on his graphic design game stuff.  He's incredible.  And then there's me... I have achieved nothing.  If anything I've gone downhill.  I haven't written anything in regards to story writing in over a year.  I've written a sentence here and there and come up with a thousand ideas.  But actually sat down and written for hours on end creating something magical?  Not in over a year.  And even then it wasn't regular.  I'm a failure.  And a liar - because I keep telling people that I've been writing that I have this awesome story I'm working on.. Just to hide the fact that I'm not motivated.

And I know my worth isn't in my grades of my employment or even in what I create - my worth comes from how what I say/write and do effects the lives of those around me for the better.  But sometimes knowing that doesn't help - especially when you feel like you keep failing those who just want to see you happy and successful.

Bad Mindspace

I'm in a pretty bad mindspace right now and I need to write it out so I can either get out of it or have it for my psychologist.

I'm just sitting here in my bed, laying really, watching clips from TV shows on YouTube.  I have a test tomorrow that I am no where near ready for and wasn't expecting to take.  I have a messy bedroom that needs sorting.  I have blog posts I need to write for Bookmas that I haven't finished and photos I haven't edited. I feel useless.  Worthless.  I've wasted most of my day just sitting here.  At least when I read I feel I've accomplished something because you actually need to think to read.  I'm just staring mindlessly at my computer screen.  I feel pathetic.  Like a waste.  Practically I know this is just a bad day for me.  My medication isn't working that great and I don't have any real good specific goal to work towards.  But low days like this really suck.  Because I really do feel worthless.  I just lay in my bed day after day doing nothing and that is so unhealthy.  I just don't know how to fix it because it's pretty clear I can't be proactive and initiate change or routine.

Day One Seroquel: A Medical Update For Personal Reference Purposes

Last night was my first night trying a new medication.  After meeting with my psychiatrist we decided before we diagnose any potential further issues we'd tackle my current issues one by one.  My mum believes a lot of my issues revolve around the not sleeping then not eating factor.  I agree.  When my doctor saw what medication I was taking at night to help me get to sleep she was somewhat shocked.  I was on an older medication that's usually prescribed for children. I've been on the same sleep medication since grade 7 and I'm now coming up to two years out of high school.  Which means I've been on that medication for 8 years.  She suggested I get a prescription for a medication called Seroquel.  In high dosages (600 mg) it's used to treat severe mental illnesses such as Bi-Polarism.  In lower doses (150-400 mg roughly) it's used as an anti-anxiety and anti-depressant. In smaller doses it causes drowsiness.  That's what I got, I'm on 25 mg a night and if I find I need more I can go up to 100 mg.  I took the medication at 9:20.  I normally take my sleeping tablets at 9:30 so I was sticking to that routine.  I was still awake at midnight but feeling drowsy.  I normally fall asleep around 1-3 am,  Last night I turned my laptop off at 12:30 and fell asleep before 1 in the morning.  Tonight I'm going to try turning it off sooner, and reading a book to conquer my boredom that ensures once my computer is off.  I sleep all through the night and woke up at almost 7:30 am.  For the last few mornings (for about three weeks?) I've been waking up between 7:30 and 8 am.  I think this is because with Spring and Summer coming up there's more sunlight and it's streaming through my curtains right into my eye line.  Usually after waking up I'd stay in bed and hop on my laptop but today I got up and had THREE bowls of cereal.  I never really have breakfast, and when I do it's usually not t breakfast time.  So this is somewhat amazing.  I know my medication didn't impact that but it's something of note.  Mum has been praying for me so this could be the result of God's work.
At breakfast mum suggested I have one of those Berocca tablets that give you vitamins and help boost mental alertness or something.  So I took two.  I realised after doing that that it said take two THROUGHOUT the day so that was aa whoops for me.
I didn't take my Ritalin today.

Then something amazing happened.  I always have a messy room.  I'm not talking a few things out of place and some dirty clothes on the floor.  I'm talking three months worth of dirty clothes on my floor, dirty tissues and lolly wrappers, dust and sand from shoes and an entire corner up to my waist of miscellaneous junk.  I have never been able to control that, I've been this way since I was little and I'm a hoarder. I like to have my things in my room.  Anyway, I pretty much never do a full clean, I'll be close but not finish and I only do that once maybe every 6 months.  And I can only do that with my Ritalin.  Well today I basically did a full clean (I have some boxes but they're categorised and waiting for mum to help me sort them since hoarder and all.. I would just keep it all..) and I ate some snacks throughout the day and I'm hungry right now.  But I cleaned my entire room in under 6 hours.  A task that even uncompleted takes me an entire day I did in 6 hours.  Without my medication.  I'm honestly so proud of myself right now.  I've never achieved anything like this ON MY OWN without medication before.

So that's how I'm currently going. Mum has a bunch of stuff she bought me to try and help but I think it's just going to confuse me and make my room clunkier and junkier.  I'll probably just keep the bedside light and that's it.. (There's a literal CD Boombox, a digital alarm clock radio and another bedside lamp.)

I'll update how the rest of my evening is going later if I remember.

Okay, here's my update.  I ate a full dinner and other than a little antsiness that showed up when mum started trying to bring other things into my room (lamp, clock) I haven't sort of had an overload.

It's 9:30 now, I just had my acne medication, a melatonin (which I haven't had regularly before or recently) and the seroquel.  I haven't and won't (for a while) be taking my endep (for my prolapsed disc) since it's also used as an anti-depressant and since I'm not being prescribed either of these medications for depression I don't want to put a double dose into my system until I know how my body responds.  I didn't take melatonin last night since in the past it hasn't done anything other than make me sleep deeper and longer (my problem is getting to sleep not sleeping) however my mum wants me to start taking it to see how it impacts me if I use it somewhat regularly.  I think it might affect my 'experiment' and alter how I perceive the seroquel to be affecting me.

First yawn at 11 pm.

Admitting I Need Help

It's a pretty common thing for me to experience heightened levels of stress and less attentiveness this time of year, especially during periods of study and education.  That's nothing new, I'm sure everyone experiences this to some degree.  However, in my history (and in this case it appears as though history IS repeating itself) its led me to total mental breakdown.  I become so sick with anxiety that I don't sleep, and I always try to take my Ritalin so along with not sleeping I'm generally not eating.  So trying to do something that doesn't come naturally to me, while being sleep deprived, not on a sleeping schedule, and not eating food (which basically means the Ritalin isn't being used to it's full potential because there's no energy being put in my system) equals one big mess.  I've been avoiding my class because admitting that I'm behind and might not pass my TAFE course makes me more anxious.  So odviously, through avoiding class I'm furthur behind.  Which makes me more anxious.  I'm currently so far behind that I'm positive I'm not going to pass.  I'm trying to remain optimistic but I also have to be realistic.  I'm not putting in as much effort as I'm probably expected; but some days when I have my medication I just can't focus on my schoolwork, something else is shiny and more important (like a book, cleaning my room) and to try and do anything else makes me really finicky and fidgety.  In this regard mum thinks I may have a little bit of Aspergers in me like dad.  If something isn't happening the way I expect it too or doesn't work with what's going on in my head I don't react right.. When it happens to dad he literally flips out, but I kind of just retreat into my head and begin stimming and get kind of like Ben gets when he's 'Baby Ben'. So I'm not sure what that means, it doesn't just happen when I've had medication.  As a small example, mum was cooking schnitzel the other night in the oven and she had some paper towel on the tray.  The crust of the schnitzel ended up peeling off and sticking to the paper towel and in my head it didn't LOOK right so I couldn't eat it. Like looking at it made me frustrated because it wasn't right.  I have the same sort of reaction when I can't do my schoolwork.  I get frustrated because it's not what my head is telling me to do.  It doesn't fit.

This has led me to believe that my ADHD is getting worse, and in turn my anxiety.  I have to admit I need help, I've reached out to a friend who can hopefully set me up with some music therapy for my anxiety.  I need to have an appointment with my Employment Consultant to discuss what could happen if I don't complete this course and give them notice that I may have some official changes made in regards to my mental health.  I also need to have an appointment with my psychiatrist (which could take months to happen) to discuss a program that is supposed to help people with severe ADHD get into a routine and learn to focus or something.  It's really hard for me to talk about this stuff out loud.  I always get emotional and start crying.  But since crying in front of people and showing that kind of emotion makes me anxious I decided to write it down here so I can show everyone without having a breakdown all over town.

I don't know if I've discussed everything I needed too but it'll have to do for now since if I edit/re-read this I'll probably delete things that need to stay.

~Becca

Christian Thoughts

I just watched a Christian couples vlog and they discussed something that I wholeheartedly agree with.

The idea that to be a 'good' Christian you HAVE to go to Church. Yes, "For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them." but in saying that God is around you all the time, He is always with you once you let Him into your heart. I prefer to spend my time with God alone, I have my personal praise I do in my room and I read verses on my own and make my own notes. Sometimes I forget for a few weeks and sometimes I forget to do anything else (the forgetting is all part of my lack of time management and not noticing it's been three weeks than lack of desire). I enjoy having Christian discussions when I feel prepared for it. But my not going to Church doesn't make me a 'bad' Christian. There are people that go to Church every Sunday, they dress up, sing the praises, they participate in communion. But then they go home and forget about Him. For me personally sermons are difficult to get through because half the time I stop listening and get distracted - no matter how entertaining the Pastor may make it - so I read them instead of listening to them. I learn more from my own study than I do listening; it was the same in school.

Making Mistakes and Learning from Them

Sometimes in life we bite our tongues.  For whatever reason, whether good or bad or grey, we don't speak up when given the chance. And we see the consequences of that eventually and know it's too late in the game to use the words.

Today one of my best friends announced he was engaged.  I of course already knew, not because he told me, but because my other best friend works with a woman whose daughter lives with him at their workplace and saw the girlfriend, now fiancee, wearing the ring and now we know.  Which was totally uncool. So seeing it announced on Facebook wasn't a surprise.  What is a surprise is the lack of acknowledgment of his friends opinions.

He's an amazing guy, don't get me wrong - he's been a bit of a man-whore party animal in the past.  But since getting a full time job I honestly believe he's grown past that. He's loyal, kind, protective.  And while he has many faults, he's a good man.

I may not know his new fiancee well.. But it's common knowledge between my friends that I have a good instinct, good intuition when it comes to people.  When my other best friend was dating someone who I didn't like, he listened and understood that it wasn't just not liking him.  It was feeling uncomfortable in his presence. He turned out to be a douche and whop I was right and this intuition has been proven time and time again - but the thing is.. Despite his knowing this, he still believes this is the right thing to do.

See, when Courtney (that's my other best friend) was with The Douche, I distanced myself from her.  She was in the situation, she didn't see what I saw.  So she didn't listen, and so I stepped back.  We're young and impulsive, if I had pushed she would have chosen him over me.  And since it was clear to me there was an expiration date I simply stepped back and waited to help pick up the pieces.

Some might think I'm over reacting, or even that I'm jealous.  But I know what I see.  What I feel.  The second this girl came into his life he practically abandoned us.  He doesn't see it but they're in  bubble.  He can't see that I've distanced myself.  That he's getting cut off from his best friends because he's too caught up to see that none of us like this girl.  I won't get into details about her since that wouldn't be fair, but I will say that I can see she's using him.  She's an immature girl who has managed to pull Zac away from HIS support network.

And I had my chance to speak up.  But given I've seen him probably three times in the past six months, and that I felt it was a conversation best had in person, and my dislike to speak ill of people (unless I'm with Courtney) I didn't.  And now, now he has to make these mistakes.  It's his chance to learn a lesson.  Because, whether it's in a month's time, a years time or a decades time.  He's going to look back and regret this choice.  His mum had him out of wedlock, the cycle will likely continue.  I have no doubt that before they get married they'll be a baby announcement.  But my chance to speak up has passed.  It's no longer in my hands.

I have to trust God knows his plans for my best friend.  Plans to help him grow.  In the meantime, I'll continue to distance myself, my other friends have already noticed my distance (and Courtneys - and her boyfriends [who went to school with the fiancee] dislike of her in general) and to be honest most of them will follow in my footsteps.  It's sad.  But they know my intuition.  They know I'm right. nd it will suck that the small safety net Zac had is disintegrating beneath him.  But it's his path and he has to see where it leads him.

I'm not really sure what I've said. But I needed to get it off my chest, and that's what this blog is here for now.  Basically it sucks to watch your bestfriend make a mistake when you didn't try hard enough to show them that they're doing the exact same thing they once hated from Courtney.  And it sucks more to know that it's out of my hands, that it's no longer my place to say anything.  That it needs to run it's course.

I'll delete this (or make it private) if anyone shares it or feels it's impolite to share this.

xxx

Some Feelings About The Future

It's been a while (a real long while) since I last made a blog post here, but lately I've been thinking about the future and what I'll pass down to my children.  See my family obviously has a history of Asperger's and High Functioning Autism.  Because of this it's very likely that any children I have will be affected in one way or another, they may end up with ADHD (like me), Aspergers (like my dad), High Functioning Autism (like my brother) or simply be affected by association (like my mum and probably my future partner, those poor normal people..).  My father is also colour blind, see this gene runs on the females line and affects the males, so it'll affect any boy I have.  These are the things I've been thinking about.  That may not seem like a big task, thousand and thousands of parents deal with children with special needs all over the world.  My fear is that I own't be able to look after them, that it'll be too much for me, that I'll resent my children for something that not only could they not control but that I passed down to them.  My fear is that I won't be capable of caring for a child with these needs in a way that would help them positively.  I know I won't have children for quite a while, but even so I also know I'm a very selfish person.  I tend not to take others into consideration when doing things and I spend a lot of my time with my nose in a book not paying attention to those around me.   I wouldn't have the patience to deal with certain aspects of a child with ADHD/Asperger's/Autism.  I know that there is a chance I'll have my mum around to help me (although there is no guarantee of that as she is over 60 years old and I'm not even 20 yet), but I also know certain support groups are fairly useless and even if they weren't I dislike them as they have an expectation of what should be 'wrong' with these children and they target those issues instead of seeing that every child is unique in their diagnosis. I hate dealing with the government and if I was managing an Autistic child then I'd have to get a careers payment and deal with all that fluff.  I'd have to get used to being seen as a bad mother because my child will most definitely have tantrums in public.  Usually because there are too many people around.  ( Click Here To See What I Mean) I'm not good at dealing with people anyway,

I just spoke to my best friend about it.  Because that's what best friends are for.  And she reminded me that there's simply a chance that it could happen, and if it does then I've learned my whole life how to deal with Aspies and Autism and I can learn from my mothers mistakes.  That I'll have emotional support from my friends and from my husband who'll hopefully be so normal that actually helping raise his own children isn't something he's unable to actively help in doing.  That'll I'll be able to sit down with her and a glass of wine and decompress.

Yes my children could be different, and if they are, or even if they're not, when the time comes I'll manage.  I'll deal with it and be able to handle it with my own support group.  It may mean I have to mature more than I probably want, but I want a big family, so I guess I have to make the decision to do what needs to be done when the time comes.

Besides, I've never cared what others thought anyway.


Becca

xoxo

Choose Happy
Appreciate Beauty
Let Love In

How To Reinvent Myself

So, it's been brought my my attention that some of the things in my life need to change.  And by some of the things I mean almost every aspect of my life.  And so to kick start myself doing this I've made a collection of lists to help me into this new life of mine.  Now it's important to remember that it takes time for a new lifestyle to become habit and one of my main flaws is that I'm lazy and never follow through with anything, so while there is a lot on this list, it may take years for all of it to come together.  I have it written down in a journal, but I wanted to share it on here.  So without further ado the lists of reinvention!

Step One: Get My Shit Together

How: 

• Wake Up Each Day (Preferably before 9, or even before 11)
• Clean My Room
• Open My Curtains
• Shower Daily
• Brush My Teeth Twice A Day
• Do My Laundry Regularly
• Do My Chores
• Keep My Room Clean And Organized
• Keep My Bathroom Clean

Step Two: Become An Active Member Of The Household

How:

• Leave My Bedroom
• Kep Keep The House Clean
• Talk To Others
• Go To Church
• Actually Sit Down For Family Dinners

Step Three: Become A Healthy Human

How:

• Morning Walks
• Clean And Cleanse My Skin Twice Daily 
• Use The Apps On My Phone For Stretches 
• Start Eating Healthier
• Stop Picking At My Pimples And Blackheads
• Weekly Sin Treatments
• Join A Gym

Step Four: Being Organized

How:

• Start Each Day With A List
• Start Using A Diary To Track Appointments
• Keep My Desk Tidy
• Follow A Schedule 

Step Five: Finances

How:

• Put $100 (Cash) Aside Each Fortnight
• Only Spend $50 on Pleasure Each Week
• Track All Expenses In A Book

Step Six: Employment And Skills

How:

• Get A Part-Time Job (15 Hours)
• Start A *Free* Bookkeeping Course
• Read 'Event Management For Dummies'
• Do A 'Proper' Bookkeeping Course
• Do A Six Month/Three Month Beauty Course
• Suzan Johnston

Step Seven: Writing And Blogging

How:

• Plan My Posts
• Finish/Re-Do Holiday Blog Posts In List Format With Pictures
• Plot Out All Four Book In Werewolf/Seer Series
• Create A Visual Book For Characters
• Take Photos For Blog
• Use Instagram And Twitter More Often
• Actually WRITE
• Book Reviews
• Products Reviews
• Recipes 

Step Eight: Appearances

How:

• Work On My Everyday Make Up Look
• Start Styling My Hair
• Plan My Outfits
• Purchase Better Clothes
• Practice Walking In Heels
• Wear Nail Polish And Maintain It
• Practice Make Up Looks (Cat Eye, Eyeliner)
• Maintain Brows
• Shave Leg Regularly
• Exfoliate Legs 

Step Nine: Faith

How:

• Go To Church
• Pray
• 'Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge him and he will make you paths straight.' Proverbs 3:5-6

Step Ten: A Little Of Everything

How:

• Posture
• Answering The Phone
• Etiquette 
• Making My Own Appointments
• Maintaining My Medication
• Feeding Fairy Floss (and Tabitha)
• Cleaning Litter Tray DAILY
• Cooking More
• Socialising. 

So there it it, ten lists of things I can do to overall improve myself as a human being.  What do you need to improve to be a better human being?  

Live long and prosper, Godspeed.

Becca

xxx

Self Evaluation

Sometimes I think I'm a sucky blogger, but then I remember that my blog is a Self-Blog.  It's my own and I don't owe anyone specifics posts.  I don't have to post what I think others will enjoy and I don't have to feel anxious that I haven't posted my holiday post, it's mine and if I don't blog for three months because the idea of doing it fills me with dread then I don't have to and the fact that I haven't blogged shouldn't interfere with my fiction writing (which it has).

100 Things I Love

1. Spring
2. My friends
3. Reading a Good Book
4. Procrastination
5. Lists
6. Netflix
7. Constellations
8. Cumulus Clouds 
9. Make-Up
10. Curled Hair
11. My Bed
12. Music
13. Lemonade
14. Strawberry Clouds 
15. Verona
16. Money
17. Op-Shops (Thrift Stores)
18. The word 'Eclectic' 
19. Taking Pictures
20. Daydreaming
21. Warm Summer Storms
22. Red Lipstick
23. Clean Rooms
24. The Idea of Eating Healthy
25. Receiving Mail (Postal)
26. My Laptop
27. Notebooks
28. Cute Postcards
29. Sweet Hot Chocolate
30. Wood Fires
31. Laughing with my Friends
32. Relief
33. Cat Cuddles
34. Turquoise 
35. Lamb Roasts (with Roast Potato, Maple Roasted Carrots, Sweet Corn and Mint Jelly/Sauce)
36. Fluffy Baby Animals
37. The Sound of the Ocean
38. My God
39. Inside Jokes
40. Chinese Take-Away
41. Soft Hair
42. The word 'Frivolous' 
43. Novelty Pens (of just Pretty Pens)
44. Queen Anne's Lace (it's a Flower) 
45. Summer/Spring Dresses
46. Lace
47. Old Things
48. Memories
49. E-Books
50. The Smell of Old Books
51. Flower Crowns
52. The Sound Typewriters Make
53. The Sound Film Cameras Make When You Take A Photo
54. Kittens
55. Electric Blankets 
56. Owning Useless Things 
57. Winnie The Pooh
58. Pink Sunsets
59. The Smell in the Air After Rain
60. Disney
61. Writing 
62. Sleeping
63. Miracles 
64. Names
65. The Internet
66. Lollies
67. Laughing Until It Hurts
68. Pampering Myself (although I suppose I actually love the outcome, the actual pampering can be exhausting..) 
69. Having my Nails Done
70. Crisp Clean Sheets
71. Surprising Myself With What I Can Achieve When I Work For It
72. Being Lazy
73. Being Productive
74. Musicals (Broadway)
75. My Eyes
76. Prettily Wrapped Presents  
77. Giving People A Reason To Be Proud Of Me
78. The Victoria's Secret Fashion Show
79. Matching Underwear Set (Bra and Undies) 
80. The Smell of Coconut
81. Feeling Confidant 
82. Fairy Lights
83. Reliquaire Fudge 
84. Having Aspirations
85. Greek Mythology 
86. Guys with Muscles 
87. Wicked Wings
88. Fresh Bread with Butter
89. Tall Guys
90. Forehead Kisses
91. Paper Stars
92. Glitter
93. Seeing Different Cultures
94. Hugs (Sometimes)
95. Seeing Somebody For The First Time (See Here For Clarification: http://alistofthingsilove.tumblr.com/post/5711442177/1150-seeing-somebody-for-the-first-time)
96. Family
97. Not Feeling Anxious 
98. When People Notice My Quirks
99. Talking All Through The Night
100. Myself. 

TO DO LIST: 15/06/2015 Monday

1) Cookie Pick Up.
2) APM Appointment.
3) Book Orthadontist Appointment.
4) Buy Blue Hair Dye.
5) Lunch at Exposeures with Cookie and Zac.
6) Buy New Toiletries (Toothbrush, Shavers, Shampoo).
7) Check Centrelink - WTH is going on with my Youth Allowence?

TO-DO LIST: 15/06/2015 SUNDAY

1) Wake up before lunch time.  (preferably around ten thirty) -Failed to wake up before lunch time.

2) Have a shower, actually clean self instead of just standing there. 

3) Clothe -in DAY clothes, not pajamas-

4) Begin cooking roast lamb and assorted extras for family Sunday lunch -Mum's done it. 

5) Finish cooking lunch (afternoon tea) and eat it.  (This should be done when the rest of the family joins and not by myself)

6) Sort out photos into dated and labelled folders on my laptop.  

7) Preferably go to bed BEFORE midnight. 

THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME

Hello lovely people!

I am home, home being Tasmania, after two long months abroad And I can say with all the authority I have, which isn't actually that much, that Tasmania has the best water in the world (well the best water in Italy, Greece, Paris, Amsterdam, London, Israel and China since that's where I went). Cleanest, freshest, nicest tasting water, in my opinion.  So there is that.

Now before you all get ahead of me thinking I'll be doing a sort of travel journalist's article about my holiday; no.  No that is not how I will be sharing my adventure.  I will be sharing it, I promise, the whole thing.  I just need to write it all first and categorize my photos so I know when to add them and so on.  So it'll take a few weeks for the full story to come out.  But I will be posting it in chapters, of a sort.  A post, or article, for each different stage.  After a quick introduction here I'll be including a list of everywhere I went, just the countries and cities, and using ONE WORDS to show how I felt about my time in each place.  Some I enjoyed, some I refused to leave my hotel room.  Please keep in mind that I can become very overwhelmed in new circumstances and situations and that I often found myself wanting to sit in my room and read.  I actually did that quite a lot..  I think I read over twenty three books altogether while I was away.  

While many of you are probably sitting there thinking, "you went away for two months wow, you must be exhausted but now you're home and get to relax," there are others who know that when you get back from a long trip a lot of changes suddenly come at you one after another and it's almost like loosing your grip on the page and flipping a bit ahead.  A lot has happened since I left home, and now that I'm back a lot is being set in motion to happen.  

Just before I left Cookie had a job interview in a small town three hours away from our home city.  On the day we left she went over for a trial at the restaurant/hotel she applied at.  She got the job and has probably experienced this book flipping forwards feelings as within two months she's gained employment, rented her own home, bought a car and acquired  kitten.  What does this have to do with me?  Well, since she is my best friend, and since she is alone in a new small town, and since I need a job, we've decided that I'll be moving down with her.  Hopefully gaining a reception job at the hotel where she works.  I won't say too much, but the little that I have said gives you the idea.  So that's a new change heading my way!

I've also decided to put in more of an investment in my blogging and writing.  I love blogging, I do, I'm the sort of person who can talk about myself for hours and it's a great opportunity to let all that out, but I've been pretty lax on it.  First I used school as an excuse, then my upcoming holiday.  Well now there is no excuse.  I'm going to 'wake-up' my book blog and start writing proper reviews and book related posts and I'll be spending more time writing up my general musings that come together to create my mind.  

Now, as for the writing.  As with blogging I love writing.  But for the most part I procrastinate.  This, in the past, has been because my writing isn't about what I want it to be about.  It's usually been for school or some brief passing idea.  I'm still procrastinating.  BUT since now I can write about what I want to write about, and I have two solid ideas/directions I can go in, I have little reason to procrastinate.  I work better under pressure so I'm going to start creating a daily to-do list that I'll be posting the night before in a separate post that I'll update at night confirming what I did and did not do.  On that to-do list I'll include major writing accomplishments (such as Finish Chapter One, or Edit Chapter Twenty Three).  So those are two things I'm hoping to start up with.  They won't be instantaneous, especially if I'm moving in the next three months as I'll be  little busy relocating. But I'll slowly begin to include them into my day to day life. 

Now I do think I've written enough for this evening, I'll get on with the list and let you be off!

Rome: Chaos.

Florence: Michael.

Verona: Lovely.

Venice: Canals.

Katakolen: Small. 

Naeplion: Boring.

Mykonos: Shopping.

Athens: Spectacular. 

Ephesus: Elegant.

Santorini: Rushed. 

Capri: Vista. 

Paris: Piss. 

Amsterdam: Bikes. 

Zaanse Schans: Cute. 

English Canals: Beautiful. 

London: Trains. 

Jerusalem: Family.

Eilat: Nada.

Petra: Flirts.

Masada: Romans

Tiberias: No.

Haifa: Nada. 

Hong Kong: Humid. 

Italy: Gelato. 

Greece: Ocean. 

Turkey: Hassled. 

France: Alright. 

Holland: Clogs.

England: Theatre.

Israel: Alright. 

China: Yucky. 

Now, please keep in mind some of these words are in reference to the place itself, something that stood out to me, or my personal experience.  I mean no offence, and I hope you enjoy the chapters to come!  Be sure to check out my Instagram becca_theory as the next few weeks progress because I'll be posting photos onto there as I go about sorting them and writing the posts.

Live long and prosper, Godspeed.

Becca.

XX

A Quick Update

Hey guys, Becca here.

I'm currently away and don't have access to a computer or consistant wifi.  I'll be giving an full update when I return in about a fortnight. 

Love you all,

Live long and prosper, Godspeed.

Becca
Xx

Twenty Ninth of March Twenty Fifteen: Holiday Countdown and Being a Good Human Being.

Hey guys,

Soo, it's been a few days since I last posted (ten days specifically) but I've been up to all types of fun things and haven't had a chance. Which is to say that I've been pretty lazy and did something cool yesterday and decided to make a post because of it!

LAfit Colour Me Active Fun Run and Walk 

So yesterday, on the twenty eighth of March, I ticked something off my bucket list.  Cookie, drove Zac and myself down the Launceston (it's about an hour and a half away) to participate in a colour run.  For those of you know don't know, a colour run is a charity run held usually for kids charities.  Participants run or walk on the designated path while volunteers stand along the sides of the path and throw coloured powder paint at you.  It's heaps of fun and a great way of raising money for charity.  So yesterday we all put on white shirts and shoes and prepared to attacked with colour!  It was so much fun and we all had a ball, we even ran!  Cookie raced a little kid and I was surprise ambushed at the end by some kids and blue powder.  I am so glad I was able to do this with my best friends and tick it off my bucket list and I am definitely going to sign up again next year. 

Myself, Zac and Cookie before we were colourfied! 

Me after the run.

Cookie Zac and Myself after the run.

Our legs and shoes after the run. 

Zac and Cookie after the run waiting for the 'Montile Duck Drop' (a bunch of plastic ducks are dropped from a helicopter). 

Being a Good Human Being

What some of you may not know is that I always try my best to be the very best person I can be.  Now this doesn't mean I push myself to my limits and work hard, I don't mean 'being the best person I can be' in that way.  I mean that I always try to forgive others, that I never let myself hurt or hate another person, I always try to be kind and polite.  Know for someone with ADHD this can sometimes be hard, but I do it.  Ever since 2008 (grade seven) I have always made sure I forgive others if my words or actions cause harm to them, as well as if their words or actions cause harm to me.  I always try to be patient with others, and kind.  If I find I cannot be around a person because they bring me down or are mean to other people I distance myself from them.  I don't stick around and let myself begin to hate them.  Hating others won't do anything but hurt ourselves and our souls.  We were made to love and it's sad when I see people not being able to do that because of others.  

 I mentioned previously a situation that has caused tension in my friends friendship and relationship. I won't say to much as it is a personal matter, but I needed to get something off my chest.  This fracturing has hurt more than just my two best friends friendship.  The incident happened on my eighteenth.  Forever the memories of my birthday will have a dark cloud over them.  What makes it worse is I knew something was going to happen.  I saw it unfolding and neither of them heeded my advice.  The conclusion is that I can no longer post pictures of my best friends on my Facebook profile.  I have to watch Zac hurting.  I have to watch what I say to my best friend on the phone and over messages in case I say something about Zac.  I have to watch a situation that CAN be forgiven and resolved through peace continue to hurt those I love.

I'm sorry.. I can't write anymore...  I just.. I can't..

I'll finish writing this later.

A Day Of Appreciation: Nineteenth of March, Twenty Fifteen

Hey Guys,

I haven't posted the last two days and decided, since I haven't really done anything holiday related, to do an old school post.  Hope that's okay with you all.

Appreciation and Thanks:

So lately I've been feeling very thankful for all that I have, the opportunities that have been blessed to me, and the people I get to share my life with, this morning in particular I felt very appreciative of what my friends are to me and their importance to my life.  It got me thinking, what does it mean to appreciate something or someone?  The basic definition of appreciate is to recognize the full worth or someone or something.  Sadly, I've noticed, that the world becomes a little less appreciative each day.  That probably doesn't make much sense just yet, but let me explain. Growing up in a Christian household my brother and I were raised to be thankful.  To appreciate what we've been blessed with and to show our thanks.  We used to thank God each morning for the day, thank him for our meals and the hands that prepared them, we used to thank him for our parents and for our animals.  Unfortunately not all families were raised this way, and I don't mean raised as thankful Christians, but raised as thankful people.  Without thanks and appreciation it's easy to take things for granted.  The other morning during Prayer and Porridge time Christopher said thank you to God for the day, for the sky, the trees, the grass, the clouds.  He gave thanks for something which we see everyday, but sometimes overlook.  Many might not see the importance of being thankful for something as simple as the sky, but he did, and it reminded me of how my actual brother (that being Benjamin) and I were raised and how far off those rails we've come.  Lately it seems the only thanks we give is when we say a quick "Thank you God for the food and bless the hands that prepared it," and when we owe someone thanks for a task or a compliment.  Christopher's giving of thanks brought me back to how it once was, and how we are not appreciating everything we have.
I decided to look at thanks and appreciation from a different angle, so let me pose to you some questions.

Is it important?  Is it important to you, to your health, to your soul, to your heart? If it is important, then why do we not give thanks for it, whatever 'it' may be?  If it was gone, would you notice, would you survive comfortably and peacefully? If so, is that not important, should we not be thankful for it?
We live our day to day lives without giving thanks for the simple things, the things we don't notice.

So there, that's something to mull on.  Giving thanks for the simple things.  And the not so simple.

Friend Appreciation

Now, onto how this has impacted my morning.  As I said previously I've been feeling very appreciative of my friends and their importance in my life.  It's easy to forget about your friends, not their physical form or their name, but what they do and mean to your life.  How they affect you in a positive way.  With Zac/Leprechaun spending a bit more time with his own family I've started to notice what his presence means for myself and my family/household.  And while for the past few weeks I've been telling him that I'm glad and thankful he's my friend.  Last night he slept at his own house, meaning he wasn't at our house this morning.  After being forced to wake up at the disgusting time of seven thirty(ish) and sitting down, I noticed that today I feel off.  I'm not sick, and I'm not hungry.  I'm just off, in my tummy, in my head, in my actions.  Just off. And I wanted a Zac Hug.  But he wasn't there.  So I sent him a simple message saying that I missed him.  To which he replied, oh hang on, I'll just post the entire conversation.  It'll make more sense.  Maybe.

Becca: I miss you.

Zac: Haha wow really?

Becca: Yeah.  I feel off and just sort of want a you hug.  And I want to chill downstairs wit you but you aren't there.

:(

Zac: Mmm... I'll be there later tonight probably.  I'll let you know. 

Becca: That's fine.  I just thought I should tell you so you know you're appreciated for more than chores and buying me/us food.  :)

Zac: Haha yeah I know :)

Becca: I know you know.  I like to remind you, and others about why they're appreciated. 

Zac: Haha well I don't get it often so I'll take it when I can.

Becca; For instence; I appreciate that you spend so much time at my house and in my company.  I appreciate that you often buy me things (such as useless cards I think are adorable) and food.  I appreciate that you pitch in around the house when it comes to jobs and cleaning.  I appreciate that you help prepare and cook food on the occasions when the 'teens' are in charge.  I appreciate your unconditional friendship.  I appreciate the fact that when mum and dad were gone and Tabby brought something in and Sherbi ate it, that you cleaned it up.

I appreciate that you motivate me, encourage me, support me, and entertain me.  I appreciate that when I'm feeling down you're there to comfort me.  I appreciate that you sometimes change your plans to spend time with me or help me/my family out.  I appreciate the way you can attend to Ben with all his different moods.  I appreciate that you've made many changes to your life since becoming my friend.  I appreciate your walk with Christ alongside my own. 

I appreciate YOU. 

So that gives you a little idea of what I mean.  Our friends, especially our best friends, do so much for us, and sometimes they don't even realize it.  I feel if we take a moment each day to just let them know that they're appreciated, and mean it, that it can change them.  For the better.  

Summarized Ending

Each day we should be thankful for what we have, for what we've been blessed with.  I'm thankful and grateful that I live in a beautiful country and state, and have a large home that is open for friends and family. I'm thankful that I have both my parents and my brother along with our additions.  I'm thankful for my friends and how they change me for the better.  I'm thankful for the amazing experience that is set out before me.  I'm thankful for the sky and the beautiful green grass, for the glistening ocean.  Be thankful. Appreciate what and who you have.  

Live long and prosper, Godspeed

Becca 

xxx

#28DaysToGo #HolidayCountdown 

Holiday Countdown! #30DaysToGo

Hey guys,

So I haven't done much in the way of research.  BUT I have (nearly) finished packing my suitcase!  Which for me is a great achievement for it to have happened so early.  For our trip to Hawaii I packed my suitcase like a week before we left..  So my suitcase is packed and that is what I am here to talk to you about.  Now, I'm no professional packer,if that's even a thing.  But I'd like to think I've become quite proficient in the art of packing my suitcase and travel bag.  Now, I'll post pictures later when I'm actually completely done but right now I'm just going to dot point what I've got in my suitcase.  Remember these posts are more for me than you, so I'm using this as a legitimate checklist for everything I'll be taking.  Nothing will be excluded.

Suitcase:

Clothing-

• Three Singlets
• Two 3/4 Shirts
• Two Tops
• One Nightgown
• One set of Bathers
• One Cover Up
• One Day Dress
• One pair of Jeans
• One pair of Shorts
• One pair of Yoga Pants (I practically live in them, they're so comfy! Not that I do yoga..)
• One Nice Shirt (for Queens Theater)
• One Formal Skirt (for Queens Theater) -CHANGE- This will be in DAD'S suitcase.
• Four pairs of Socks
• Six pairs of Throw Away Undies
• Six pairs of Undies
• One Night Bra
• Two Bras (only one packed at the moment..)

Shoes-

• One Pair of Cheap Converse Shoes (must put orthotics in them before we leave!).
• One Pair of Leather (probably cheap leather, but leather nonetheless) Ballet Flats.

Other-

• My Nikon D5000 in it's camera bag, multiple SD cards inside, plus charging cords. 
• Two packets of my favorite menstrual pads and a box of liners.
• A Beach Towel
• A Smaller Micro-Fibre Towel
• My Make-Up bag.  (Containing; moisturizer, pimple related things, my make-up, braces wax, and a travel toothbrush and toothpaste thing.)
• Shoe-Oder Powder

Travel Bag:

• One Singlet
• One pair of Undies
• Emergency Menstrual Pads
• A Roll-Up Blanket 
• My Bible and a Highlighter
• A Fold-Up Bag
• Cardigan
• Fluffy Socks
• My Butterfly Pillow Pet
• Passport Related Stuff (To Be Packed -TBP)
• Slippers
• iPod and Phone - USB chargers and earphones too. (TBP)
• Notepad and Pen (TBP)
• Mini 'Make-Up' Bag (TBP) - Containing; moisturizer, toothbrush and toothpaste, lip balm, hand cream, hand sanitizer, emery board, glasses cleaner cloth, hair bands, and bobby pins.
• A Water Bottle (TBP)
• A Small Wallet for my Cards (Packed but without my cards in it..)
• My Lace (have I told you guys about my lace? Whatever..) (TBP)
• Deodorant
• A few Strawberry Chuppa-Chups (TBB/TBP)

Wearing:

• Yoga Pants
• Undies and a Sports (well, it's called a 'sports' bra but it really doesn't offer much support for sports.. It's just comfy and looks nice) Bra. 
• Orthotic Thongs

There.. I think that's everything? Just so you all know I've been rolling my clothes to make them fit nicely and I'm okay to throw away some of my shirts while we're away to make room for new clothes. So I've been pretty busy today.  Well, actually that's a lie.  If you ask my parents, Cookie or Zac, they'll tell you I played Sims most of the day.... But that isn't the point.  I have achieved a lot in the last little while.  Remembering to make a post being one of the things I've achieved.  But this afternoon -once I publish this post- I'll be doing some research for my dear Cookie.  Well trying to.  I'm not 100% certain of what she needs help researching.  But I'll find out!

Also, before I go, I just wanted to clarify something.  Yes, Cookie and Zac did have a tiff of sorts.  And they are friends again.  But they'll never be as close as they once were.  And that's okay.  

If you guys have any suggestions of what to bring on the plane with me (it's a 36 hour flight) I'm open to suggestions, I'll have access to my Kindle and other books on my phone and music, and I believe they play movies and TV shows, but yeah.

Live long and prosper, Godspeed.

Becca

xxx

HOLIDAY COUNTDOWN

Hi guys!  

Sorry I haven't been around, I've been busy living the life of the unemployed and lazy!  No, seriously, I no longer have a reason to procrastinate so I haven't been writing (it's the only task I set myself and I procrastinate it by playing on Pinterest), nor have I been reading, as reading was what I did to procrastinate.  Not that I've cleaned my room in the past 4 months, or that I'm regularly doing my chores.  But that isn't really the point.  I've just been slouching around doing not much of anything  and helping Cookie with her new online course.  

A lot has happened and I'm not actually sure where I last left off so I'll do dot point to catch you up on the life of me, Becca.

• I graduated high school.
• I turned 18, I just had my friends (all seven of them) come over and we played video games and watched Dexter.
• Cookie and Zac had an altercation that has left them in a permanently fractured friendship that can never be what it once was.
• I had streaks of my hair bleached and dyed turquoise blue.
• I went on a ten-day holiday to Waikiki, Hawaii with my mum - I'll post pictures and such at a later date.
• My brother-ish thing, Christopher, graduated from YWAM with his DTS training done.
• I re-met my now grow second-cousins. 
• Christmas came and went.
• I joined up with Centrelink, on Jobseekers.
• New Year started without much fuss - I did not complete my 2014 New Years Resolutions, and didn't really set any for 2015.  I will to a Throw Back Post and talk about my old resolutions sometime soon. 
• Leprechaun/Zac has basically moved in downstairs.
• I was baptized. 
• I was referred to a special employment agency for people who have a health issue that prevents them from working in specific circumstance. 
• Cookie started an online diploma for Events to give her a better understanding of the industry when it comes time for her to open her own catering company.  I personally think she should call it Cookie's Catering. 
• I made a study guide for Cookie so she'll get her work done by the allocated date - not that she's really sticking to it.  But we'll work on it. 
• I made a study plan for my brothers course, however he is less interested in following the plan set out for him.  
• My back is still sore, however the pain has reduced monumentally, however I'm on strong medications. 

Okay, so there you go.  You've been brought up to date on my goings on.  Now to tell you about what WILL be going on.

This year my lovely mother has planned a European/Middle East Holiday for herself and me.  I won't post too many details right now, but I will over the next 31 days.  Why over the next 31 days I hear you ask?  Well, my lovely people, we will be leaving for this grand two month adventure in just 31 days! It's very exciting, and terrifying and extremely overwhelming. I feel very blessed to be given this opportunity and I hope to gain the most out of my adventure as possible.  To solidify this point, over the next month I'll be posting information about our holidays, the history of the locations, and what we'll be doing over the next month as I learn about it.  You see, my mother planned it all.  So it's a bit allover the place and I was so confused and then with the addition of the foreign names and such I was just lost.  Still am, but I'll be working on putting our itinerary onto my phone and working through the history of certain places and I'm hoping this will clear up some of my confusion. 

So, I'll be having a countdown for the next 31 Days, Each day I'll post a location we are going, a bit about the place in regards to history, and how Mum and I are going in regards to packing and getting prepared to leave on our grand adventure!  

#31DaysToGo #EuropeanHoliday #Countdown

I'm sure it'll be educational for us all, and entertaining above all else.  But most of all I think it'll be good to set myself a task each day as I'm currently doing nothing.

Now, let me explain to you all why I am still unemployed and why I'm not doing any courses. You see, with my back the way it is I haven't been motivated to get a job out of fear of doing more damage or just being uncomfortable.  Since joining up with an employment agency I've obviously had to apply for a certain number of jobs per month.  With no such luck as of yet.  As for courses, well I still aspire to be a writer. I doubt that will ever change.  My only obstacle in regards to that goal is myself and my lack of motivation.  However, looking at it realistically, I need to start heading in a specific direction that will lead me to a job with a sufficient income to keep me afloat while I continue to pursue my dreams.  So I've decided to do an online course for a Diploma of Events.  I chose this field for a number of reasons, I love to make lists and plan things, I like attending events but I prefer to be the host or someone working at said event/party, and I like seeing others happy from something that I did or contributed to.  Another reason is Cookie and I plan on working in conjunction with one another once we're professionals.  That is if I don't end up as a Cruise Activities and Events Director/Manager.   How awesome would that be? 

So that's where I'm at, and that's the plan.

Live long and prosper, Godspeed

Becca

xxx

November the Ninth 2014

#stillnotoverFrozen

Hey guys!  So it's been what.. Seven months since I last posted?  Whoops.. My bad.  I'm not going to rant on and on about how I'm sorry.  I was busy and wanted to pass school and that's about it.  Now I would like to make a few things clear before I get into this;  I won't be using nicknames for my friends anymore.  When I started out I wanted to let them have their privacy and what not, but the nicknames I gave for each of them aren't all as relevant as they were eleven months ago.  So the nicknames are gone.  If you have any questions about who is who feel free to ask.  Secondly I would like to state that I am still friends with Courtney (Cookie) and Zac (Leprechaun).  However over the next few months I won't be posting as much about them as they are starting apprenticeships and I'm going to be travelling. That's not to say they won't be included; because they will.  But they'll be few and far between.  I'll also not be posting everyday.  I still can't quite remember why I made that my plan for this year?  I'm a commitment phobe and a procrastinator so that wasn't one of my better ideas.. I'll be posting when I want and when I can.  I'll be posting more frequently on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook with quick short updates in the near future when I get more memory on my phone.

Okay, now onto the catch up?  I suppose it's only right, right?

Okay, so I don't know if I got around to telling you guys but I've had a sore back for a large percentage of the year I was kinda hush hush about it in the beginning.  I'm the sort of person that doesn't like to worry those closest to me - this also explains why I don't like getting mad or crying around people - so it wasn't until about three months after the pain started that I told my mum.  We went to the doctors and he just thought that I had normal back pain and it would go away soon.  After another month of pain mum decided I had sciatic pain, she decided to tell my doctor I had sciatic pain.  I did not have sciatic pain. Though what actually happened is very similar to sciatic pain and all related to the nerves.  I had a prolapsed disc in my lower spine, usually this would naturally go away after a few weeks.  Mine clearly has not, I've been on a high dosage of medication since we found out and it's confirmed that in the future at some point I'll need surgery to fuse my disc to my spine. So that sounds like fun. But for now, because I don't have a spare six weeks for bed rest (I'll get onto that in a moment) I'm going to have a needle inserted into my spine in three days to (hopefully) give me either permanent or temporary relief from the pain. So that's the update health wise.

Now, before I get onto my end of year plans and my plans for next year I want to share some very exciting news!  I'm now officially a high school graduate! How amazing and crazy is that? I don't want anyone to think that I passed with flying colours.  I may have passed school but I'm positive that over my two years at my school (it's a year eleven and twelve school, so there's only two years) and eight classes that I've failed four of them.  And if not failed then only just passed.  But just because I didn't necessarily pass those classes doesn't mean that I haven't learnt a lot from them or that I didn't enjoy them.  I did.  All of the classes I've taken I've enjoyed immensely.  Well, almost all.  English Literature (Studies) was a horror and I wouldn't suggest that class to anyone ever.  But yeah, so I had my last day on Friday and on Tuesday I have my one and only exam - which I'm actually partially confidant about- and then I won't be going into school for anything other than collecting my artwork (which I will post a picture of) and returning my school laptop.  It actually hasn't quite kicked in yet that I'm done.  I took photos and videos and will be compiling them together into one and I'll post it on YouTube.  But I'll share a little video of myself and my friends singing and just having fun on our last day and some pictures I took once I've finished writing this segment.  But yeah, I'm not so much going to miss the education and school itself but more the teachers, fun I had, and my friends.  I commented on one of my own statuses saying something which pretty much sums up what I'm trying to say.

"I can't help but think that I just wasted fourteen years of my life doing something extremely unpleasant but that I've been conditioned to associate with friends therefore tricked into thinking that I'll miss it."

Jesse (G-String) and myself.

Jesse and Hopey

Caitlin, myself and Courtney (Cookie)

Courtney, myself, and Zac (Leprechaun)

Courtney, myself, and Zac

Courtney, myself, and Zac

Courtney and myself

Jesse and myself

Jesse and myself

Jesse and myself

Josh, Courtney, myself, Zac, Jesse, and Zac

Zac, myself, and Courtney

Back Row: Cameron (Camroon/Chummy), Jesse, Zac, Josh

Front Row: Courtney and myself

Back Row: Shane, Emily, Courtney, Zac

Front Row: Jesse, myself and Justine

Back Row: Shane, Emily, Courtney, and Zac

Front Row: Jesse and myself

Tavis, and Jesse

Myself and Zac 

My feet. 

And now for a video!  

(I'll make a full length video of all the songs we did and all my photos but for now here's a classic for our group!)

Also, just an extra bonus.  Have our school mascot , Douglas, smoking a joint and getting arrested for dancing at assembly.

So sorry for that slight spam, but those pics are some of my favorites and I just had to share them.  Okay, now onto my plans for the coming few months.

So for starters I should probably say that it's my eighteenth birthday on the nineteenth of this month.  So that's exciting.  I won't be having a huge party or even drinking. It's just gonna be my close friends coming over for a tummy roast dinner then playing video games into the early hours of the morning.  With lots of cake.  But as a little birthday present, Mother Dearest has booked a tiny holiday to HONOLULU FOR TEN DAYS!  I can't even describe how blessed I am, and it gets better! Anyway, after our ten days in Honolulu we'll be travelling back to Australia and heading up to Queensland for my 'brothers' graduation from YWAM DTS.  We'll stay until the twenty second and have a Christmas party on Boxing day.  BUT IT GETS BETTER!

May next year Mother Dearest and myself and heading off on a huge European holiday featuring a Mediterranean cruise and a trip to the Sherlock Museum!  We'll also be travelling to Israel if we can to meet with the cousins.  I honestly feel so blessed to be given this opportunity to travel before having to get my life in working order. I'll be blogging when I can and posting photos and updates as our internet comes and goes and I honestly cannot wait to begin this adventure!  

So there's an update, as I said before I will post when I want and if that means I post seven times in one day, then so be it.  

I hope all you 2014 graduates the best for the future and I'm so thankful to have gone to such an amazing school.  

I almost forgot, here's my artwork. 

It doesn't look like much, I'll post individual photos later if I feel like it.

But it's taken me over sixteen weeks to get these seven pieces.

Zac is my model.  Lucky guy huh?

Live long and prosper, godspeed.

Becca 

xxx